Meltdown

There's a fairly good chance that I might have a meltdown soon. Should I chronicle it in the blog? I'm sure it's been done before. Oh well, I'll have to think about that.

Another lost weekend. Sleep, work, gym, chores, work, sleep, work, gym. I did go out to lunch today and sat in the sun and read my book. It was nice. And then I came home and worked for 5 hours. Wow, how's that for a life.

Still feeling like crap. It's like something's wrong in my life and I can't figure out what it is, but I know it's there and it's just eating at me.

Aghhh. Maybe a more up post later this week.

So much for my happy ending

Seriously, as I got into my car to drive to work on Wednesday morning, still reeling about the election, and with a growing pit of despair growing in my stomach, this is the song I heard. Avril Lavigne's "My Happy Ending."

There would be no happy ending for the war in Iraq. No end to the deficit spending. No end to the tax cuts for the super wealthy. No end to the polluting of our air and water. "Would you like arsenic with that?" The strange thing is that most of that bothers me, but not at a personal level. Sure, I'd like to be able to take my neice and nephew to a park someday and let them see herds of buffalo, or let them swim in rivers or the ocean without having to fear some sort of bizarre biological infection. And they'll end up paying for most of the tax cuts we're giving ourselves while we still continue to spend, spend, spend. But that stuff doesn't effect me personally. It's all sort of abstract. Until you get to the Supremes.

One of the biggest reasons why I didn't want Bush to win anothe term is becasue he will get to appoint atleast 2 and probably up to 4 Supreme Court justices. With a Republican control of both the executive and legislative branches of the government, he will be able to corrupt the last bastion of social justice in our country. The US judicial system has been the one saving grace to the religious conservatism that has swept our country. Between the Supreme Court overturning the sodomy laws, and the Massachusetts Supreme Court ruling on gay marriages, the judicial system has been the only way to advance equal rights for gays and lesbians. And now with Bush and his republican controlled Senate, he'll be able to undermine the court and we will lose any semblance of checks and balances in this country. Just becuase a lot of people agree with something, doesn't mean it's right, fair, or just. And we looked to the Supreme Court to overturn the most hateful and prejudical of these "popular" laws. Bush will have the opportunity to influence the judicial system for a generation by placing right wing justices on the bench. Be afraid. Be very afraid. The darkening storm comes and it will be a long night for gays and lesbians.

Democracy in Action and Reunion Part II

Democracy In Action. So I got to sleep in a bit since the plan was to hit the polls first thing in the morning. So no morning workout, just a little extra sleep, shower, dress, vote to change America, and then head to work. It all sounds so simple, doesn't it? Well, I head out of my place around 645AM to walk the 4-5 blocks to the polling place. When I get there, the line is atleast over 150 people long and has stretched down one side of the block and has turned the corner. Just amazing. In Virigina, I used to waltz right up to the polling place, check in, vote, and then head out. Wham, Bam, thank you Uncle Sam. But not in DC. First was the line to get into the polling place. Then once inside, you had to stand in line to check in based on your name (L-R). Then once you had checked in, you had to stand in line to get a ballot. A paper ballot. Gee, how 1960ish. Then you went to vote and then you had to stand in line to feed your ballot to the machine. All total, it took about an hour for the process. Next time I'll know to bring a book. But an hour is definitely worth the price for democracy. I would have stood in line all day to vote. I just wish my vote was in a swing state or a red state so it would matter.

Speaking of, it dawned on me while I was standing in line that vote has never really counted, and I've been voting since I was 18. Okay, here's the deal. All of my time in the military, I voted via absentee ballot. And unless the race is close, and usually in CO (my military home of record) it isn't, the absentee ballots don't get counted. So this time I get to vote in a real election and hopefully make a difference, and what do I do? I move into DC and my vote gets lost in the blue tide that will give Kerry 3 electoral votes. Oh well. I've looked at all of those red states and I have to say, ugh! I'm not moving there.

Reunion Part II. Have you been to a reunion lately? Does it remind you of a job interview or a trade show? There's a whole bunch of people you vaguely remember, most of them have changed (fat, bald, whatever), and what do you say to them? You haven't seen them in X number of years, so unless you've kept in touch with some of them, you stick to generalities. For my reunion, the conversation script was as follows:
1) Are you in or out (of the Navy that is).
2) So what you doing now (for the Navy or in the real world)
3) Still single, or are you married, or divorced? Children?
4) Isn't the reunion great. Having a blast? Have you seen so and so?
5) Hey, it's been great talking with you, I want to go say hello to (insert random name)
6) Buh-bye.
I started to get tired of the script after awhile and thought about mixing it up a bit.
1) Oh yeah, I'm out of the Navy.
2) Nope, I'm sort of between opportunities right now if you know what I mean. My last employer had some sort of problem about me using company funds to pay for my herion addiction.
3) The wife left me after I sold her wedding ring and all of her jewelry to pay for a fix. The good news is that I think I've kicked the habit and looking for work again. Does your company have any openings?
4) Oh, I understand. Have you seen (insert name here), he said he might be able to hook me up with some place to sleep tonight. I'm kind of homeless at this point.
5) No I completely understand. Tell (insert name here) I said hello.
6) Buh-bye.

Of course, I could just tell my classmates I am gay and then see which ones freak out. But that's just way too much drama.

Reunion Part 1: Fix Bayonettes

Okay, so I went back for my 15th reunion this past weekend. I really didn't want to go, but a friend sort of coerced me and I finally gave in. We bailed from DC a little early and got into Annapolis in time to hit the reunion registration and pick up our badge and other stuff.

Anyways, after the registration, we went onto the Yard (as the Academy grounds are known) to see the Parade. A little bit of nostalgic USNA trivia. What does IHTFP mean? Option A) I Hope There's a Friday Parade? or Option B) I Hate Those Fucking Parades. Any guesses? So this is the first time I've gone back to see a Parade. It was cool to finally be in the stands watching all of it and not having to worry about all of the drill stuff. You never think about it while you are actually suffering through it, but the whole pagentry of it is pretty cool. Pretty cool and useless. Unless you go Marine Corps, this is most likely the last time you'll ever have to drill in formation. Just another piece of tradition for tradition's sake. But it does look cool.

The one piece missing was "fix bayonettes." It's this aweful drill move where you remove the bayonette from it's sheath, then fix it to these ancient, heavy, total useless M-16s. It's all done as a precision move, but if you fuck it up, you're screwed. Oh, and did I mention you are getting graded on all of this. So I was completely bummed that they don't do the "fix bayonette" move anymore. How wimpy.

And what do they do in place of it. They sing. Seriously. They SING. To show their spirit and professionalism they sing. The Navy Fight song. The words to that song were erased from my mind many years ago, but here was the Brigade of Midshipman singing this song. And I swear, in any other circustance that would come off as cheesey. But surprisingly it didn't. I'm still bitter about the whole fix bayonette thing, but I can see where singing is a bit safer.

Okay, more reunion crap later.

Trey @ USNA circa 1989 

Alpha and Omega

Welcome to the creation. To the Alpha. To the beginning of my blog. After reading a lot of blogs, I decided to take the plunge. So look for random musings, rants, and just odd observations in the days and months to come. But for now, it's late on Halloween night and I need to crash. Ciao!